Welcome to the Dungeon of Doom!

Acursory glance revealed no secret doros in the immediate vicinity. Thinking that now might not be the best time to be looking, I trotted back down the corridor and fired a frost ray at the halfling again. She was starting to annoy me now.

Move back up, Ray of Frost at halfling

While the halfling is distracted, Bob hits her full-strength with the frost ray.

9 damage, halfling is bloodied

The maceman tries just one last time to thump Argumentus about the brains (it is hopeless)

Immune to any potential concussion, Argumentus has had just about enough of this smug human. He winds up his wooden stick with great force, knocking the dwarf in the noggin, and swings.

Argumentus strikes Human cleaving into Heironymous

Both enemies are given a severe drubbing, beating them within an inch of their lives. Either of them could likely be knocked over by a mild breeze.

9 damage to human, 4 damage to dwarf

Becoming ever irritated with things not dying, I hung my crossbow at my side, drew my sword, and moved in next to the dwarf with a hammer, so maybe a sharp pokey thing would manage to do what his big stick could not.

1 right, 1 down-right
Store crossbow, draw sword
Sky flourish at halfling

Distracting Kyra with the glint of his blade, Fescue makes a sudden slash, laying open her arm from shoulder to wrist.

Critical Hit! 9 damage

With the big fighter being harder to hurt than an orc on a bender, the wolf turns its attention to Fescue's exposed back. The rogue is knocked to the floor in what seems to be a pattern.

5 damage, Fescue is knocked prone and bloodied

Clutching her wounded arm, Kyra backs up a step and unsteadily aims the heavy crossbow. The bold clatters against the ceiling well over Motsognir's head.

Unable to safely maneuver through the melee to reach an easier target, Hieronymus is resigned to fruitlessly bonking Argumentus about the chest.

Fescue's HP: 15

The dwarf watched the wolf become distracted by Fescue and he shuffled sideways, spitting into his hands and then swinging the hammer down at the Human's neck.

"Kord's will, I'm beginning to think the elf woman raised this group from the dead, the difficulty they seem to have with dying."

Shuffle one step over
Bolstering Strike at Hoonam Captain

Motsognir, still a bit heady from destroying the elf, leaped into Gabriel's footprints and swung wildly at the wolf.

Move to Wolf
Warlord's Favor on wolf, with attack benefit to Argumentus

The maceman's neck snaps on impact, and his head lolls to the side as he slumps lifelessly to the floor.

Critical Hit, 13 damage. Human maceman killed.

Motsognir tries his hand against the wolf, and meets with better luck than most. Fur flies as the warlord separates the animal from a major chunk of its hindquarters.

15 damage, wolf bloodied.

New round: Bob 25, Halfling 23, Motsognir 19, Wolf 17, Fescue 16, Dwarf 15, Gabriel 15, Argumentus 9

Emboldened by the orgy of destruction the horde were playing out in front of me, I moved forward to join them. Seeing the feeble halfling struggling with the crossbow, I pressed home my advantage.

"Hey stunty, you know if I'd met you anywhere else I might think you were kinda hot. Shame I'm going to have to put you on ICE!"

I yelled my masterful insult as I blasted the tiny wench with another frost ray.

Move 3 spaces east, Ray of Frost at halfling.

Totally devastated by your ice burn, the halfling woman promptly loses all will to live, collapsing face-first onto the carpet.

8 damage, halfling killed

Viper's strike on that goddam wolf

Motsognir's axe slices the wolf right down the middle, putting a stop to all that irritating barking.

9 damage, wolf killed

At this point, most of their blood had been spilled on the floor, I could tell, because I was laying on the bloody stone. With that dwarf, who's mouth was too big for his little body, standing over me, I wriggled out from between his legs like a birthing gopher.
I stood up and saw that my friend, the other mouthy dwarf (was this a trend?) was all that was left. I looked down and saw that man's mace lying on the ground. I figured if it would hurt him as much as it did me, we'd be in good favor.

Stand in right square.
Pick up mace.
Throw it at his HEAD!

The airborne mace whirls beautifully through the dusty dungeon air, twirling merrily on its way. Gently, it taps the desperate old dwarf atop his head, and then clatters to the floor. The old bastard takes a long, deep breath and mercifully collapses.

SUPREME VICTORY. Party gains 750 XP (150 XP each)

The dwarf wiped his bloody hammer on the pelt of the wolf to clean it and then slung it up over his shoulder, grinning like a madman as he began to walk around the room, checking the bodies and then finally that decrepit old throne. (Most specifically looking for an upgrade to plate armour on the dwaf, if he had it)

"Well now, that was certainly bracing, wasn't it?"

He kicked the dead dwarf's body as he passed by it.

(Argumentus stands around and drools on the human's corpse)

Motsognir was internally ecstatic, and was visibly struggling to keep it internal, lest the paladin think him some kind of nancyboy. Wanting to seem productive, he examined the dead dwarf's equipment, hoping to find something more effective than what he had waken up with.

On the bodies:

Warhammer (1)
Two-Handed Crossbow (1)
Crossbow Bolts (13)
Chainmail armor (1)
Longsword (1)
Shortsword (1)
Leather armor (2)
Set of thieves tools (1)
Dagger (2)
Shuriken (6)
Mace (1)

Dwarven Chainmail (Card)

On the throne:

A length of copper tubing lies upon the cushions, ignored by the room's most recent occupants as seemingly worthless. A closer examination, however, reveals the faint hum of magic. (Card)


The interval of quiet also allows Fescue to determine the properties of his recently-acquired cloak. (Card)

Distribute these goods amongst yourselves at your own discretion.

The dwarf leaned down and unhitched the armour from the now-dead dwarf, tsking his tongue lightly as he shoved his body over and lifted the Dwarven Chainmail from him.

"Well now, doubt you'll be needing this anymore, friend."

His own scalemail having been damaged in the fight, he quickly shed the armour and donned this newly acquired bit. Always favouring Dwarven engineering. He glanced down at the staff and then looked around for the elf mage.

"Oi. You there. Elf woman. Think this may be more your speed here." Though he made a point not to touch the thing.

I found some extra ammunition and shuriken blades, and packed them away, along with an extra dagger and lockpick kit.

While the rest of the would-be thieves looted the corpses of the corpses, I walked about the room and observed it, trying to deduct what was so special about it that it had to be guarded. I took particular interest in the animal cage.