Home remedies & family cure-alls

So like, everybody has family remedies and treatments. They might not work but they sure do soothe the soul.

When I was growing up, my mom used vapo rub for basically every flu I had. A tradition way back from my great-grandmother, I later found out! Also, she served us copious amounts of chicken soup or apricot juice (not at the same time).

My cousin's husband, meanwhile, was talking about his insomnia while he was staying at his wife's parents house (my aunt and uncle). He mentioned how my aunt woke up in the middle of the night, saw him awake, and offered him Tums; apparently Tums is their cure for everything. I can't fault it, it does have a lovely chalky texture that you know isn't gonna upset your stomach.

My coworker's grandmother's solution for all your illnesses: a nice good poop. And it works, too!

WHACHA GOT

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Quote:

My coworker's grandmother's solution for all your illnesses: a nice good poop. And it works, too!

There's nowhere I can't reach.

My great grandmother would also make me drink hot tea with honey and lemon juice for a sore throat. It actually worked wonders. It's still one of my favorite drinks.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Hot mint tea or ginger ale for an upset stomach. That was the remedy my mother always had to offer.

I have made clove tea for stubborn sore throats or tooth pains. Just ground cloves wrapped inside of a coffee filter, steeped in hot water. There is some science behind the remedy, but you do have to be mindful as clove oil is toxic.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

STEP ONE - GET A POT
STEP TWO - PUT A BIG GOB OF VICK'S VAPORUB IN DAT POT
STEP THREE - PUT POT ON A STOVE BURNER
STEP FOUR - PUT A TOWEL OVER YOUR HEAD
STEP FIVE - INHALE THAT SHIT DO NOT LET IT ESCAPE YOU CAN DO IT BE A MAN

FIXES GOD DAMN EVERYTHING

GOT A COLD? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. FEELING SORE? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. BROKEN SPINE? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. SCURVY? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. TAILS IS MAGNETS WHAT IS THIS? VICKS YOUR MIRACLES OVER THE BURNER. AN ANTARCTIC FUR SEAL HAS BEEN OBSERVED TRYING TO HAVE SEX WITH A KING PENGUIN? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER.

How ya doing, buddy?

I remember as a kid when grandma was with us (still alive, just not in my folks' place now), I somehow put my hand on an electric stove top that just turned off.

Within a minute my hand was submerged in a bowl of soy sauce.

I don't recall the result of that, but since I wasn't able to remember it, I assume the recovery was successful.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

This is not wisdom gained through family, but something I read when growing up.

A cure for hiccups.

Being by sitting in a relaxed position. Bring your arms forward, and bend your wrists while extending your index fingers in such a manner that they point directly at each other. Keep them separated by about five inches.

While focusing on the space between the extended fingers, slowly bring them towards each other. Not too quickly--about one centimeter per second. Bring them closer together, slowly and carefully. Closer, and closer. Closer still. When they are just about to touch, focus intensely on bringing the tips of your fingers as close together as you possibly can without having them physically touch.

You will find that your hiccups are gone.

FELIPE NO

My mom showed me this hiccup trick, but it is difficult to do by yourself so get a friend you fucking shut-ins.

First, the hiccuper gets a full glass of water. While he drinks, the helper puts both hands on either side of the hiccuper's neck and presses firmly but not like, choking.

But your hiccup story is better sheep.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Peppermint tea for upset stomach. I grow peppermint for this very occasion.

Aloe vera for sun burns. I use the actual plant leaves, which will take the sting out of almost any burn within MINUTES. I can't tell you how many awful burns I've averted with the leaf of an aloe plant.

Orange juice daily to keep away sickness. When I'm sick, I drink a LOT of it.

Thick, creamy cocoa butter for dry skin.

Acer's trick, sans Vapor Rub stuff. I've never used it. I just use very hot tap water... whatever steams.

Tiger balm and ace bandages have got me through many, many, MANY sprains and tendon issues. Fuck ice packs and shit. I use ace bandages <3

Lavender or chamomile "pillows" for falling asleep. (Stuff fabric full of dried herb, sew closed, keep under pillow)

There are so many things. I'm not big into the "visit a doctor when you don't feel well" schtick. He's not going to tell you anything you don't know. Learn to use what's around you to help you through your sickness!

Also, heh heh, I'm prepared for the shit I'll receive on this one, but I don't endorse it necessarily: hookworm in the human body apparently prevents allergies and a whole host of other issues. NY Times article on the thought

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by ElectricSheep

This is not wisdom gained through family, but something I read when growing up.

A cure for hiccups.

Being by sitting in a relaxed position. Bring your arms forward, and bend your wrists while extending your index fingers in such a manner that they point directly at each other. Keep them separated by about five inches.

While focusing on the space between the extended fingers, slowly bring them towards each other. Not too quickly--about one centimeter per second. Bring them closer together, slowly and carefully. Closer, and closer. Closer still. When they are just about to touch, focus intensely on bringing the tips of your fingers as close together as you possibly can without having them physically touch.

You will find that your hiccups are gone.

There's a reason this works. You're so busy focusing on the precise movements of your fingers that your breathing becomes regulated to match your concentration. The diaphragm spasms are controlled by the deliberate breaths.

My 7th & 8th grade science teacher, Mrs. Behm, showed me a similar method. But it involved sitting with your feet firmly planted on the floor, taking the deepest breath you can, exhaling it as long as you can and keeping your hands held outstretched before you the whole time. Repeat as necessary and don't become discouraged if it takes a few minutes. It's worked for me every time.


For years, my own personal remedy for the flu was to drink two shots of whiskey, then climb into bed under more covers than were necessary. The story I'd been told is that the alcohol causes the liver to kick into high gear to filter toxins; in doing so, it also helps the body flush out viruses - or something like that. The blankets were for sweating out the excess toxins that the liver and kidneys didn't catch.

It sounded silly at first but I felt like total shit one night and figured at least the alcohol would let me sleep a bit better. I awoke the next day feeling a thousand times better. I don't know if the whiskey matters but it's been my standby cure for the flu ever since.

Though copious amounts of 7-Up and saltine crackers are a decent placebo.


My own trick for getting rid of a stuffy nose is to hold a jar of ground horseradish to my face. The fumes have a magical way of causing the congestion to drain right away. You don't even need to use any of it up. As long as the horseradish is good (and the vinegar lets it keep for a long long time), it'll do the trick.

There's nowhere I can't reach.

Lavender essential oil dabbed on your pillow if you are having difficulties sleeping.

Rescue Remedy for mild nerves/anxiety.

Olbas oil on a handkerchief kept near a blocked nose (I used to be given this all the time if I had a cold/flu and was having trouble sleeping).

Gently rubbing dock leaves on nettle stings to ease the pain.

All of these from my mother. I'm sure she had one for bee stings as well, might have been baking soda.

An ex boyfriend of mine made me a hot toddy when I had a cold once; it was pretty effective so A++ for whiskey.

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Originally Posted by AcerBandit

STEP ONE - GET A POT
STEP TWO - PUT A BIG GOB OF VICK'S VAPORUB IN DAT POT
STEP THREE - PUT POT ON A STOVE BURNER
STEP FOUR - PUT A TOWEL OVER YOUR HEAD
STEP FIVE - INHALE THAT SHIT DO NOT LET IT ESCAPE YOU CAN DO IT BE A MAN

FIXES GOD DAMN EVERYTHING

GOT A COLD? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. FEELING SORE? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. BROKEN SPINE? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. SCURVY? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER. TAILS IS MAGNETS WHAT IS THIS? VICKS YOUR MIRACLES OVER THE BURNER. AN ANTARCTIC FUR SEAL HAS BEEN OBSERVED TRYING TO HAVE SEX WITH A KING PENGUIN? VICKS YOUR LUNGS OVER THE BURNER.

And remember: you can wet the towel before wrapping it around your head to muffle any tracking device in your skull.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Originally Posted by a_lurker

My coworker's grandmother's solution for all your illnesses: a nice good poop. And it works, too!

This is the first thing my grandma asked us if my parents ever dropped us off for a sick day from school. "When's the last time you pooped?!"

If we ever had a sore throat, Grandma would make us gargle salt water. Of course, as we were little kids, we werent very good at gargling, so we ended up drinking half of it and getting a stomach ache. Thats when the ginger ale came out.

For burns, I've always been taught to put it under cold water for a moment, and then wrap it in cellophane for a little bit. Something about cutting the air off from it, I guess...?

Most amazing jew boots

The reason people tell you to use lavender to cure insomnia is because they think the insomnia is stress related. Lavender has long been used in aromatherapy to treat stress. Of course science has proven that lavender has no actual effect on stress, so...

Also, Temari, cool water, not cold. If you use cold water you can do some pretty hefty damage to a burn.

And lastly, Sass, taking a ton of vitamin C is fine, but anything over a set limit and you just piss it out. I am a huge proponent of taking vitamin c in general, though. Can only do you good. But on the hookworm thing, sure, it may slow down your immune system to help with allergies, but it also, you know, shuts down your immune system, can lead to anemia, retardation and can cause chronic blood loss by damaging the stomach lining.

My stance on hating most homeopathic medicine is pretty obvious over the years, I'm sure. To put it mildly Sass and I do not see eye to eye on the subject. I don't like doctors either, but it will be a cold day in hell when I grow moss under my bed to stem lower back pain and help heal open sores.

I'll settle for taking a belt of whisky for a sore throat and some nice, hot tea for a cough. I'll use the spices that make me feel better in food and drink, and not bother thinking aromatherapy can do anything but act as a placebo and a distraction, and I'll stick to growing my moss outside, thank you very much.

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Originally Posted by a homewrecker

My stance on hating most homeopathic medicine is pretty obvious over the years, I'm sure. To put it mildly Sass and I do not see eye to eye on the subject. I don't like doctors either, but it will be a cold day in hell when I grow moss under my bed to stem lower back pain and help heal open sores.

Honestly, not to excuse our differences, but maybe it's an American medical treatment thing. (That's not to say this is the ONLY reason I dislike visiting doctors.)

There's a lot of frivolous, expensive procedures done needlessly. Pills are quickly prescribed when the actual resolution can be easily tackled without. I've experienced it in my own right, and I've seen many, many people go through the same thing. (Adderall to TWO YEAR-OLDS? REALLY?)

I expect our system has a lot to do with this. I pay co-pay after co-pay just for literally a 2 minute visit with my PCP.

Maybe I'm being naive and ridiculous when I imagine Canada being different in terms of medical care and "good" advice.

It certainly puts me more at ease to think that a doctor is actually giving me good advice out of concern instead of personal profit. I feel that's not the case in this country a lot of times.

Either way, I respect your opinion, whether or not we agree.

FELIPE NO

Sour plum, extracts of a lime, and honey immersed in hot water until the honey's diluted and the water cools down. My mother use it for coughs, cold attacks, and fever.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Originally Posted by Sassafrass

Honestly, not to excuse our differences, but maybe it's an American medical treatment thing. (That's not to say this is the ONLY reason I dislike visiting doctors.)

There's a lot of frivolous, expensive procedures done needlessly. Pills are quickly prescribed when the actual resolution can be easily tackled without. I've experienced it in my own right, and I've seen many, many people go through the same thing. (Adderall to TWO YEAR-OLDS? REALLY?)

I expect our system has a lot to do with this. I pay co-pay after co-pay just for literally a 2 minute visit with my PCP.

Maybe I'm being naive and ridiculous when I imagine Canada being different in terms of medical care and "good" advice.

It certainly puts me more at ease to think that a doctor is actually giving me good advice out of concern instead of personal profit. I feel that's not the case in this country a lot of times.

Either way, I respect your opinion, whether or not we agree.

In actuality, in a lot of ways we agree. I don't even remotely understand people who run into the doctor every time they develop a cough, or a slight sore throat. That whole concept sort of baffles me. It's when I hear people tell me they had blood in their eye, or chest pains, and they go the homeopathic remedy first that makes me wince. I also just shake my head at anyone who thinks aromatherapy is anything more than a nice smell and chiropractors can fix anything but bones being out of alignment.

But generic expression of a deity knows I won't sit here and try and defend the US medical system. I'd sooner try and defend the Titanic as unsinkable.

Jam it back in, in the dark.

Originally Posted by a homewrecker

My stance on hating most homeopathic medicine is pretty obvious over the years, I'm sure. To put it mildly Sass and I do not see eye to eye on the subject.

Homeopathic medicine isn't traditional remedies. Homeopathic medicine is made by diluting real medicine with water, then diluting that water with more water, then on and on and on. It's supposed to strengthen the medicine somehow.

The concept only applies to medicine (and zinc; zicam is homeopathic), however. Shit in sewer water that is later treated? That's not homeopathic shit, that's just tap.

How ya doing, buddy?

I can personally vouch for lavender being useless; when I was living at home and going 40+ hour stints without being able to sleep my mother used to put some on my pillow every night. Did bugger all. For minor problems not requiring a doctor/medication, just some reassurance, I figure that what people don't know won't hurt them. If it frees up some doctor's appointments I don't mind.

also

This thing is sticky, and I don't like it. I don't appreciate it.

Whenever I got a cold or, well, any sort of flu/sickness my family's recipe was to make some really spicy chili. Like, generally spicy to the point the people not sick don't want to eat it because it's too spicy. It'll usually open you up quite a bit, and it's refreshing to actually eat something you can taste.

Also beans help you poo later.

I did read about this neat thing for headaches where you lightly press on the artery going into your head along your neck. It seems to really reduce the pressure I feel in my head, and if I'm able to hold my hand there for a few minutes I can generally make about 75% of the headache go away. I always wonder if sometime I'm just going to wind up dying from a stroke while doing it, though.

I am a dolphin, do you want me on your body?

Oddly enough; foot and temple massages. I really don't believe in the acupuncture shit but it sure feels good!

I think in the past 4-5 years the only thing I've seen a doctor is for infections that definitely need anti-biotics. Other than that, I deal with illnesses the old fashion way of plenty of rest, plenty of fluids, and lots of trip to the bathroom.

Most amazing jew boots

Originally Posted by Dullenplain

I remember as a kid when grandma was with us (still alive, just not in my folks' place now), I somehow put my hand on an electric stove top that just turned off.

Within a minute my hand was submerged in a bowl of soy sauce.

I don't recall the result of that, but since I wasn't able to remember it, I assume the recovery was successful.

O asians U~

What kind of toxic man-thing is happening now?

Home remedies where pretty much all I had growing up, I lived in a community that can only be reached by boat, so we had to make due with bandages and aspirn, and we improvised for other issues.

Big cuts and gashes: If you badly skinned yourself or got a big gashing cut, we would use a Bread Press. You dip a large bread bun in warm water, place it on your wound and tightly wrap and tie it with a cloth and leave it overnight. The bread absorbs everything from the wound, prevents infection, and make the cut heal faster.

Sore throat: We would use molasses, and sometime peanut butter. They are very thick and will coat your throat good, but it only lasts a short time because after swallowing your own saliva, the molasses will wash away.

Make cough syrup last longer: I made this one up only a few nights ago.... it's weird and it works. Cough syrup only works while it coats our throat, swallowing our saliva just washes it down, to make the syrup last a little longer place a face cloth in your mouth, the cloth will absorb you saliva. I did this at night to help me sleep... I find it really hard to sleep with a sore throat.

Runny/Clogged nose: Neti pots work wonders. There are more things that you can do to unclog your stuffy nose. If you have a stair case, just run down and quickly run up a few times, you will feel your nose drain, doing a hand stand works too, or just lay on your bed belly down and touch the floor with your hands. When you feel the blood rush to your head, stand up and your nose should unclog.

Flu: Drink ginseng tea.... lots of it! Just drink it continuously, even when you are not thirsty. Just jug the stuff, the only solid I recommend that you eat are eggs, reason being is the flu drains your energy, the tea will help flush it out of your system, and the eggs will keep your energy up, even if you have no appetite, try to force a few down. I have done this many times and it works.

Stiff Back: I have not had this issue, but my husband claims that punching a certain spot on his back helps. I have punched his back many times... and loved it.

Nausea: Shake up some ginger-ale until it becomes flat. Drink it and you should not want to throw up as much.

How ya doing, buddy?

For hiccups I drink a glass of water upside down (bent over, drinking from the farther side of the glass). It does the trick quickly, which I'm sure is based on the fact that you need to focus your breathing to do it without inhaling the water.

What, you don't want my bikini-clad body?

Ok, so last week, I've been suffering with the kanker sore on the tip of my tongue. I mean, it was like the queen of all-time kanker/cold sores in the mouth, ever (hurt like the bitch expectancy of a royal mother, too). Some of you in chat may remember me bitching about it.

Three to four days of suffering, and I was taken to my boyfriend's mom's house for dinner. She had some kumquats on the table, and told us there's a ton on her tree this year that she'd never know what to do with. I love fruit in general and had no qualms about eating these little jewels (plus, hers were REALLY ripe and sweet <3), so I ate a few (eat them whole, skin and all, and spit out the seeds if any).

After dinner, I popped another couple in my mouth again. By this time, the bitterness and the sour citris acid had done WONDERS numbing the side of my tongue affected by the cold/kanker sore.

By the next morning, all there was left of the sore was a slight pink/reddish tint left and the infected sore was down to a minimum. =D

For those of you who don't know what they are:


Grandma always said these were great for little bumps and cuts in the mouth, but I didn't know they were this effective. I'm sold. <3

Jam it back in, in the dark.